My Twins Philosopy So Far

A parent of twins often gets the same questions from curious friends and family, and often complete strangers. Here are some of my answers and thoughts on the matters at this time in my journey with twins.

How do I like boy/girl twins? I'm thrilled to have boy/girl twins. It took a little adjusting to the idea at first, but now I agree with what so many folks told me when I found out we were having boy/girl--that they are the best kind! Thanks to those who were so positive, by the way, because it did make me think, and open up my mind. I was surprised to hear so many people be so happy that I was having boy/girl twins. Anyway, I love it now.

Do I dress them in coordinating outfits? Only when we go out. I really like playing up the twins aspect. I feel like the attention you get while you're out with both babies, and the fun of having them match, etc., helps to offset all the work and hard parts of having two babies. When my sister had twins 3.5 years ago, I told her, "I'm not jealous of all the work you'll have, but I am jealous of all the attention you'll get." I never thought I'd have twins, but it still holds out that the attention is a positive side effect for me.

Do I wake one up to eat at the same time as the other one? I don't. My favorite sleep book says to never wake a sleeping baby, especially in the first 4 months. It might be different if I was nursing. But so far, it's worked out for us. I'd rather have them staggered by about 30-60 minutes (and often they are without my help), than both be hungry at the same time. I guess the books on twins that suggest waking them up mean to wake one up after you've put the other one down, thus staggering them, but anyway, I've let them sleep until they wake up, and as you know from my previous post, they're developing EXCELLENT sleep habits!

Have I felt overwhelmed yet? Of course, at least once a day, if not the whole day long! For me, it's usually when they won't sleep for more than 20 minutes during the day and I have a baby in my arms all day long. Another time is when one or both are wailing (full-throttle crying) and I don't know why or how to help (I know, this is colic, but I've never had a colicky baby before). It's very unnerving for me to not know what my baby needs. My three singletons (all boys) were very easy babies. In fact, they were so easy, I tried not to talk about it because other moms didn't want to be my friend if I told about it (just kidding, but almost serious!). I pretty much always knew if they were tired, hungry, bored, etc. They all slept very well, and through the night early on (did I mention that sleep book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child yet?!). I really couldn't relate to friends who had difficult babies or didn't know why their baby was crying. BUT I SURE CAN RELATE NOW!
Isn't it interesting how our own experience shapes so much of our perception? I could agree in theory that some babies cried for no reason, or liked to be held facing out, or wouldn't take a pacifer, or would only take a certain brand of pacifier, but inside I just thought the parents hadn't read the right book (yes, I LOVE to read books on whatever I'm doing) or tried other options. But now that I've experienced a baby that resists calming, and that prefers a different pacifier than the one I like, or that only sleeps 50 minutes (Ben sleeps 50 minutes for most of his naps, which is long compared to some babies, but not as long as I'd like, and yes, not as long as "the book" says a nap should be).

Ok, so this is long, but it is a philosophical post! I guess I should stop for now, since Lucy is tired of her plug and is ready to eat. I'm hoping to get back on later today to post recent photos.